SomethinGrimm

People laughing and playing. smiles around. Christmas a time spent with family now for toys and sound gifts are not supposed to cost a thing. When presences are all it should bring when everyone around you lost the meaning of Christmas within toys and new stockings. But the years when I felt attached meant the world. The magic, The shoes filled with chocolate gold. The kisses on the stairs. When I told my mom all I wanted was a notebook and thousands were shared. Her little writer is hidden behind poems. Crying to remember laughter but memories is all she lives off of now. I used to act so innocent so kind and naive but that girl got

lock it away. all the voices in your head telling you to lay in bed. what they say isn't always right, nothing will come for me tonight. what they spew is lies only meant for my eyes. forcing me to say and do things never meant for you. your love rings true. like a bell i promise not to sell. but they keep telling me that your lies are hidden behind my key. that you got to show your love. only meant for me.

Past something we all eventually try and avoid. There are things That we lock away. Things we avoid. Things we want to forget. Yet you are there. Part of my past just sitting there in your tree of messy hair. Lost in blue eyes of a summer gone so fast. Yet over a thousand miles you lay in rest. Thoughts of me never to come. I was your fling of the past, and there for you I'll remain.

How to tell you what happened. We fell. Like jack and Jill we went up that hill. We never found that pale of water. Our hearts forever wonder. Dancing a fight that none could win. Exhausted every night hoarse voices caught in the wind. One second you'd tell me you loved me. One second you'd tell me you'd leave me. Who thought it would have been me to leave you. Who would have thought I left you because I love you. I didn't want you to chase a dream made with me. Your 'dream' girl. Well now I'm a memory. Drifting in the wind, my name spoken on sailing ships. Lost in the light of the light house. Only to live on shore singing t

somedays, i don't fit in i watch my family talk i know, i am not here i may be sitting in the room but i am not there i may put my words in and my mouth may move but the acknowledgment of my existence is empty. i listen to them talk about my mother i listen to them say everything, but is that because i didn't belong. or is it because i am lost. lost, wandering among words words, from the past words, to the future. things that wont let me bury this hatchet still i can't breath on a normal rate nothing can make me leach on to the world around me nothing can make me belong to somewhere i'm not eventually i will be in a world where my be

Here I stand; Rubble in the ground now No more          Green floor planks along the kitchen floor No more          Standing on the grate to get warm No more          Red curtain blocking the sun No more          Smokey haze filling the dark room The weekends never seeming to end Along the road around the bend A chimney never seen again A home to many Now houses none A sister, mother, stepfather, and me Lost on our loss If I close my eyes I can see it all Just like I was there again The teal kitchen My mother standing at the sink Angel laying down with Isabella on the couch Star and Spike greeting me Star                  hopeful for Roxi

Some of us get lost. some of us feel numb. some of us follow the grain to just fit in afraid to be a knot in the wood. All working to become a branch and even maybe a leaf. but some of us can't feel that some of us don't feel like we can continue. that we are stuck and some just end.

pain is everywhere you look just have to close your eyes and feel it. sometimes it is waiting for you when you turn around, sometimes it takes it's time and attacks you when you are already down. and just when you least expect it, it goes away. all the feelings you felt and all the eyes you left closed to hold back the tears, everything you have ever felt it just goes away. when i look at you i see a friend, when i look away i feel the pain knowing your only a friend and when i reopen my eyes i forget it and move on. no one is worth another tear on that pillow, another misspelled mistake, another heart to break. so don't try and tell m

The name that I shall not mention. the heart which has been sealed off. the broken bond that i tore apart. the last light we let burn out. the thought of you is only enough,. where i can move on I know you cannot. because I know i have that effect on people. i know you are lost in your own interpretation of my world. where i am horrible and cruel. but know this not but last if but now. you and i are all but part of the same current not my fault i wanted to jump out of the sea.

To which i cannot say. I count the days. to when you make your choice to when i have to stop waiting. to when this hell will end and when will that be i couldn't say. this love is all lock and key. i can't be in love with you. i told myself i can't love you. and now here i am wishing you were here beside me holding me and telling me how much you love me how much you care. and i wish I could just help you. that i could tell you how much you mean to me. but the words get lost before they come. you befuddle me/ and then the glimpse you see is my shell. the girl on the outside/ the one without love. the one who can't admit her love. the one